i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
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