He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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