the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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