oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
