Dual....:-)
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
