at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
