Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize