Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
