and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Randomize
