Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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