There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
