Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
