my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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