Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Randomize