do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
