He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
