Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize