Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Drunk is a universal language darling
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
