But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize