North Korea, Best Korea!
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
