i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
