Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
