do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Randomize
