so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
