i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
