: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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