I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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