she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
