Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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