I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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