yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
