My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
