im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize