why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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