I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I will be naked everywhere
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
