i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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