I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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