I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
