Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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