is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
