I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
