You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
