Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
