I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
