ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
