I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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