Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Are we still banned from the library?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
