You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize