nutella sex= disaster
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
