I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just blew my weed a kiss
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
